Fic: Alice & June

The short introduction.

*January, 1999, at the "Zénith", Paris*

I wanna go to a gig. Well there's Placebo gig at the Zénith. I don't know much about this band but it seems to be cool.
Well, I'll go to see how it is.
*Later*
Well, the gig is over now. It was really cool.
Someone that I know comes to me as I was leaving.
"Nicola, I know the guys of this group. I told the singer, Brian Molko, that you were going here. He knows your group and he'd like to meet you."
I stares at him.
"Well, ok. Why not..."
And as I was planing to leave, someone leads me backstage to meet Brian Molko, singer of the band Placebo.

*July 2005*

I look at the songs. The new album...Alice & June.
We recorded the songs, I just need to do this one...
This special one...
I look at the sheet 'Pink Water'
Suddently, I remember how I met him...
It was in 1999. I went to Placebo's gig and he wanted to see me. Then we became friends. He's my best friend...
There's something special between us... I can't explain that...
Perhaps i'll know more about it later.
Well I need to know when we would meet to work on this song.
I want to see him... I don't know why but I just think I wouldn't want to this him so much if he was only my best friend...
I dial his number...

"Brian?...Hi, it's Nicola I just call you to know when we would work on 'Pink Water'"
I don't say more...I'd like to tell him that I miss him so much...But I don't... I just wait for his answer.
"Hey! Nicola! Well I'm working on our new album, so I'm at the studio every day. And Steve and Stef planed to take a break next week...So perhaps, you could come here. And how are you?"
I smile as I hear his voice, his soft voice...
"Yeah, it's a good idea. I'll get a plane ticket and I'll tell you when i'll be in London...Well I'm okay, our album is nearly finished."
We talk again for a little while and he hungs up.
Brian...
I miss you...
My friend.
I need to know what is this strange feeling between us.
Since I last saw you...My life isn't the same anymore. I miss you.

*One week later*
Last week, I wasn't able to do anything. I was just thinking...About you...about our friendship...About...the dream that I had every night since I last heard your voice...

I'm in London now...I pick up my phone and call Brian.
"Brian? It's Nicola,...I'm in London, I'm on my way to the studio I'll meet you there?"
"Hey Nicola...Sure I'll be here."
We talk for a little while and he hungs up.
On my way to the studio I just keep thinking about him...
I think I know what is this strange feeling now...I love him...

I get in the the studio and see Brian sitting on a chair
"Hey Brian!"
I hug him and I feel my heart beating faster...
"Nicola! It's so cool to see you again!"
"Yeah, I missed you you know..."
I laugh trying to sound..."normal"...
"Yeah, I missed you too..."
I look in his eyes and smile...
"So, how are you Brian?"
"Well, I guess i'm feeling better now..."
"Better? Why, what happened?"
"I broke up with Héléna...again...But now...It's really finished..."
"Oh god Brian..."
I can't help but be happy...
Perhaps then...No...It can't...How can he be in love with me? I'm 15 years older than him...
"And you?"
"Me...Well...I'm ok..."
I don't say much. I'm ok now cause he's next to me...Cause my personal life was...shit. I'm not anymore with my wife...but I still see my daughter.
"Are you sure? You're not so quiet normally..."
"Well...I just...I'm not anymore with my wife..."
"Oh god...I'm sorry Nicola..."
He take me in his arms...
Oh god,...How I wish this could last....

In blue, Brian POV
_________________________

"Don't be, it's ok now...Can we start working on the song?"
"Yeah if you want,...Did you find something for the music?"
"Yeah, I worked on it...I found something, I recorded it...Perhaps you could hear it and tell me what you think."
"Ok...No problem."
I put the cd on and we listen to the music.

"Wow, Nicola, it's really cool...Now, we can put the voices on it.
"Ok, let's work on it now..."
I go to the record room to set my part of the voices.

I look at him as he's in the room...He's so beautiful...
It's strange...We're now both singles again and...I meet him again...
How I wish I could be with him...
But I think it's just a dream and nothing more...
He wouldn't be with someone like me...

I record my part and then you go to do yours...
I look at you...Brian...
Why can't I be with you?
I so wish I could...I know it's not impossible...but for me it kinda is...
This will jus be a dream and nothing more...
Then you finish recording your part and we decide to take a pause.
You sit down on the couch and I sit i front of you.
As we talk, I can't stop looking at you...
I place my hand on your leg but then quickly pull it away.
"Nicola..."
You take my hand and look at me in the eyes...